Building Rapport Through Representational Systems and Predicates
Effective communication isn’t just about words. It’s about how people process and express information. A simple way to build rapport is by recognizing and matching someone’s preferred representational system—how they naturally think, speak, and make sense of the world.
In NLP, we describe these as Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic, and Auditory Digital representational systems. While everyone uses all of them, most people have a favored system that influences how they communicate.
By recognizing and aligning with someone’s preferred system, you can quickly build a deeper sense of connection and ease in conversation.
Why Does This Matter?
Imagine you’re having a conversation with someone, and you naturally say, “I see what you’re saying.” And the person you’re speaking to says, “That doesn’t sound right to me.”
You’re using visual language while they’re using auditory language.
This mismatch might seem small, and these subtle differences affect the flow of communication. Learning to match someone’s representational system makes it easier for them to engage with you—which naturally builds rapport.
What Are Representational Systems?
Representational systems refer to the sensory-based ways we take in and express information:
✅ Visual – Thinking in images, seeing mental pictures, noticing colors and spatial relationships.
✅ Auditory – Thinking in sounds, focusing on tone, rhythm, and verbal expression.
✅ Kinesthetic – Thinking through feelings, physical sensations, and movement.
✅ Auditory Digital – Thinking through logic, internal dialogue, and structured reasoning.
Everyone Uses All of Them
It’s important to note that no one is just one system. We all use some combination of visual, auditory, kinesthetic, and auditory digital. Most people tend to favor one or two in everyday communication.
For example:
✔ A visual person might say, “That looks great! I can see how this will work.”
✔ An auditory person might say, “That sounds good! I like the way you explained it.”
✔ A kinesthetic person might say, “That feels right! I need to get a better grasp of it.”
✔ An auditory digital person might say, “That makes sense. The logic checks out.”
Recognizing these patterns helps you communicate in a way that resonates with the other person.
What is a Derived System?
Auditory Digital (AD) is considered a derived system because it isn’t directly based on sensory experience like the others—it comes from internal processing and structured thought.
People who favor Auditory Digital often focus on logic, systems, and structure rather than sensory-based language. They may switch between different representational systems depending on the situation.
Because Auditory Digital is about internal dialogue, someone with this preference may use a mix of visual, auditory, and kinesthetic language, depending on how they process information in that moment.
Matching Predicates to Build Rapport
Predicates are the specific words and phrases people use that reflect their favored representational system. Subtly matching their language makes your communication feel more natural and aligned.
Here’s how it works:
Visual Predicates
📌 Keywords: See, look, picture, imagine, focus, view, perspective.
📌 Example:
Person: “I just don’t see how this will work.”
You: “Let’s take a closer look at the details.”
Auditory Predicates
🎵 Keywords: Hear, listen, sound, resonate, speak, say, tell.
🎵 Example:
Person: “That doesn’t sound like a good idea.”
You: “Let’s talk through it and find something that sounds better.”
Kinesthetic Predicates
🤲 Keywords: Feel, grasp, handle, touch, solid, heavy, balance.
🤲 Example:
Person: “This just doesn’t feel right to me.”
You: “I get that. Let’s find something that feels like a better fit.”
Auditory Digital Predicates
🧠 Keywords: Think, understand, logical, makes sense, process, analyze.
🧠 Example:
Person: “I don’t think this makes sense.”
You: “Let’s review the logic and see what needs to be adjusted.”
Matching someone’s natural way of speaking creates an unconscious sense of familiarity, making rapport-building much easier.
Identifying a Person’s Favored Representational System
Beyond words, people’s preferred representational systems also show up in how they engage with the world. By paying attention to subtle cues, you can get a sense of which system they naturally favor, making it easier to adjust your communication style accordingly.
That said, this is not an exact science—people don’t fit neatly into categories. A person might display characteristics from multiple systems depending on context, mood, or the type of information they’re processing. The key is to observe multiple clues rather than relying on any single indicator.
Here’s how you can recognize tendencies in each system:
1. Visual Thinkers
👀 Often look upward when recalling information.
🖼️ Speak quickly and tend to describe things in terms of images.
🔹 Like visual aids, diagrams, and written explanations.
2. Auditory Thinkers
👂 Tend to look side-to-side when recalling sounds.
🎶 Speak at a moderate pace and may focus on tone and rhythm.
🔹 Prefer conversations, discussions, and verbal instructions.
3. Kinesthetic Thinkers
✋ Often look downward when recalling experiences.
🐢 Speak more slowly, using feeling-based language.
🔹 Prefer hands-on experiences and physical movement.
4. Auditory Digital Thinkers
🔹 Because Auditory Digital is a derived system, people who favor it may exhibit characteristics from all other systems depending on the situation.
🔹 Their communication often reflects internal dialogue and structured reasoning rather than strong sensory-based language.
By noticing these patterns and considering multiple factors, you can identify how someone naturally processes information and adjust your communication style to build rapport more effectively.
The Key to Natural Rapport
🚫 Forcing this process will make interactions feel robotic or awkward.
✅ Subtle alignment makes conversations flow more naturally.
When you start paying attention to representational systems and predicates, you’ll see patterns in how people communicate. The goal isn’t to change how you speak entirely—it’s to adapt just enough to make communication smoother and more effective.
Final Thoughts
Recognizing someone’s favored representational system and matching their predicates is a powerful way to deepen rapport and improve communication.
When you speak in a way that aligns with how someone naturally processes information, you create a stronger, more effortless connection.
Consider This:
What if you could instantly improve communication just by listening for the right words and adjusting slightly? How might that impact your relationships, business, or daily interactions?
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